The Media Guy Grabs His Sack

The Media Guy grabs his sack of mail...Well, I resisted and resisted; but no longer. The mailbox is full and alas, people need answers. So, without fanfare, here are genuine emails from my irreverent readers.

Q: My wife and I spent the last three weeks trying to figure out which airline you flew that would only have one passenger in business class and not upgrade the rest of economy so the meals wouldn’t go to waste. I observed that Daniella, dressed in that green scarf, looked like a career runway model that could still bring the heat. After much discussion, we created a game: Most Probable Professions for Flight Girl Daniella if She Hadn't Become a Flight Attendant. After discussing some possibilities (most likely: Heather Locklear’s advertising executive nemesis in the third reboot of Melrose Place), we decided on "First Grade Teacher." Our minds went wild at the thought of FG Daniella bitching and moaning about not getting paid for parent conferences before 8:00 A.M. because she doesn’t get paid before the first bell and her classroom doors are still open, then berating the class about the time it takes her to pour milk at snack time. But dear God, FG Daniella gets the ultimate pass because as my wife, the librarian, said “I bet she’s up for kissing me.”

—Jay M., Las Vegas, NV

Adam Ant's Librarian

MG: Do you have any idea how many sleepless nights that Jay M. from Sin City caused me? Too many, that’s how many. Why? Because I just spent the last three days imagining the Adam Ant librarian aka Jay’s wife and Daniella locking lips in business class. Then, I imagined her and Heather Locklear in a typical Melrose catfight. However you slice it, I’m bringing this to my agent next week for script development.

Q: I really can’t explain why J.C. Penney decided to go with Ron Johnson as their CEO, robbing America of the almighty orgasmic pleasures of the Super Sunday Sales. It’s almost as if he were a plant from Penney’s competitors designed to bring down the retail giant. Half the fun of shopping there was rolling out with 22 coupons and mixing and matching them just to “save” $31 dollars. How did he go this long without being on Retail Magazine’s most hated list? They need to bring back the coupons and the sales. This must be on your to-do list in your first month as the Ambassador of Sanity for J.C. Penney’s corporate headquarters.

—Salma Q., Torrance, CA

MG: Although Penney’s hasn't bothered to pick up the phone yet, I think you hit on something because Corporate Ambassador of Sanity sounds like a fantastic consulting road show. I could cruise from city to city, company to company listening to their brilliant marketing and media ideas for 2013 and 2014. Have you seen some of the bright ideas that flew past us during the last twelve months? The London Olympic Games logo? Quiznos’ disfigured, singing rodents campaign? Sony's synergy campaign? Sprint featuring CEO Dan Hesse in their TV ads? All of these companies need an Ambassador of Sanity. Yeah, I’m getting excited already.

Q: I’m wondering how Chris Brown keeps getting chance after chance with a suddenly forgiving media who is dying to give him a pass for beating on Rihanna and women in general with his insane actions. Is it because she’s a party animal that can’t seem to get out of her own way socially or is there really something redeeming?

—Samantha J., Kansas City, MO

MG: First and foremost, everyone simply loves a train wreck. Chris Brown certainly qualifies for that. He also certainly meets rule #2 in the Media Guy Mandates for a Great Story: HARM. Harm includes violence, damage, dying, scandals and blood/guts. Perhaps the real reason rests in the Fear Factor rule whereby the media is afraid a Chris-Brown-type will show up at their front door to pick up one of their daughters for a nice evening on the town. This is where you already want to know what a maniac-in-sheep’s-clothing looks like while he’s promising to get her home well before curfew. Experience means everything!

Q: There's no more underestimated story line in 2013 than hypersensitivity. Coca-Cola is racist. Ikea is has (trans)gender issues. Just a little while back we were patting ourselves on the back about racial and gender equality and everyone getting along. Everyone thought political incorrectness was washed up, but all of the sudden it made a comeback and the media has been all over it. Are we desperate for stories or should we be worried?

—Jordan Smith, Kansas City

MG: Holy mackerel, I didn’t realize how many groups were in an uproar about the media game already in 2013. The IKEA ad features a Thai man and his girlfriend shopping. But when she sees pillows sale and get excited, her decidedly female voice goes soprano on us sending her shocked boyfriend off running. The ad has riled a Thai transgender group, who calls the ad "negative and stereotypical" and sprinkled in "a gross violation of human rights" for good measure. A Thai transgender group seems pretty niche in the grand scheme of things but then again, I missed sensitivity training for this particular segment of the population which mosts likely totals 0.0000001% of the world’s population.

The new Coca-Cola Super Bowl ad has angered Arab-Americans because it features an Arab leading a camel caravan through the desert.

Warren David, president of the American-Arab Anti-Discrimination Committee, says "Why is it that Arabs are always shown as either oil-rich sheiks, terrorists or belly dancers?" Coke says the ad characters are a "nod to movies of the past." 

My take? 

I’ve worked with David in the past and he is right, because the shepherds leading the caravans look something like this:

True story: I took these pictures in Oman a few years back. The shepherd in the truck was angrier than those lecturing Coca-Cola about their perceived racism. Why? Because I drove in between his line of camels and messed up their forward progression. Later, we burned some Frankincense at the Salalah Hilton and all was better. Perhaps Coke should call me to be the shepherd actor next time.

So what’s the lesson to be learned? Better focus test your commercial to the groups you are showcasing in your ads because you want their stamp of approval before the fit hits the shan. Then again, perhaps all of the extra publicity Coke and IKEA are getting from these spots is worth the hassle to offend underserved ethnic and gender groups. All I know if that this meets rule #3 in the Media Guy Mandates for a Great Story: CONTROVERSY. Where there’s controversy, there’s a reporter looking to file a last minute news story. When you can dream up a controversy, you can virtually guarantee some juicy buzz in the media.

Twinkies: Yippie-keye-ay!

Q: Not since Reginald VelJohnson rattled off Twinkies’ to John McClane in Die Hard [sugar-enriched flour, partially hydrogenated vegetable oil...polysorbate 60... and yellow dye number five] have I longed for a late night tastes of the golden crème-filled cakes. Will they ever grace the shelves at Winn-Dixie again?

—Emily-Mae L., Auburn, AL

Q:  Sometimes I wake up in a cold sweat with Ghostbusters’ Dr. Egon Spengler  explaining the enormity of the threat facing New York: "Let's say this Twinkie represents the normal amount of psycho-kinetic energy in the New York area; according to this morning's sample, it would be a Twinkie 35 feet long weighing approximately 600 pounds"… What would this analogy be without the mighty Twinkie? Sign my petition to bring them back.

—Robert H., Anaheim, CA

How about that 600 pounder?

Q: I feel like Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, searching for the last Twinkie on Earth. I guess they did have an expiration date. Help!

—Brenda J., Istanbul, Turkey

MG: Never fear, Hostess has let the robber barons into their bakery nest. Hostess has picked a joint offer from two investment firms — Metropoulos & Co. and Apollo Global Management LLC — as the lead bid to bring back the Twinkies and its other snack cakes in a $410 million bid. According to MSN Money, Twinkies pulled in about $76.2 million, Hostess Donuts brought in $384.6 million and CupCakes brought in $138.1 million during Hostess’s final year. That’s a lot of calories. Speaking of which…

Q: Nice feature on Ray Lewis right before my Ravens made Tom Brady look like a deer in the headlights a couple of Sundays ago. Are you taking the Ravens in the Super Bowl?

—Joe J., Las Vegas

Q: I suppose you’ll be in Florida this Sunday covering the Super Bowl, right braggard?

—Phillip O., Cleveland, OH

Q: No blogs on the 2013 Oscars, eh? Did they ban you for your debauchery at the after parties?

—Sandra, K.., Toronto

MG: I am betting on Ray, but not the Ravens on Sunday. There’s a Las Vegas proposition bet where you pick who has more: Ray Lewis tackles or Kobe Bryant assists on Super Bowl Sunday. I’m going with Lewis tackles, but the 49ers prevailing 34-19. As far as going to the Super Bowl, I am a no show. I didn’t even apply for credentials. I’ll be at home analyzing the new ads. I am unsure whether to tweet about them (Media Guy Twitter handle = @marketingvip) in real time though. One thing I hope to never miss is the Oscars. I’ll be there on the red carpet for the second year in a row and blog about it then. Hopefully, I’ll be stealth enough to bypass security and have a talk with Angelina Jolie about this screenplay I wrote that is perfect for her (hint, hint Ms. Jolie).

Q: I read somewhere that sex lasts only about five minutes on average and burns only 20 calories. Why doesn’t that get more press?

—Dianne R., Toluca Lake, CA

MG: Reminds me of being seventeen all over again. Did your survey mention the age parameters? The regions of the country or world the data was pulled from? Male vs. Females? These are important factors in the potential decline of sexuality in the States. I did find a reference to a 1984 survey with similar stats. I’m hoping things have improved for the women of the world. Which reminds me that we don’t cover sex enough in The Media Guy Struggles. Why? I’m not sure since SEX meets rule #6 in the Media Guy Mandates for a Great Story. Note to self: more sex. (And who can argue with that?)

Q: Did the CEO of Taco Bell call you yet? Is that why their strategy is giving free churros? Maybe you should call him.

—Nala Z., Ft. Myers, FL

MG: Who can argue with the new spots? The ad made its debut on YouTube a few days ago and has over 200,000 views with the January 18^th teaser being watched 500,000 plus times. CEO Greg Creed seemed to be riding high with Cantina Bell, the new Taco Bell “Live Mas” tagline and the Spanish version of “We Are Young”. That being said, I still think Mr. Creed should ring my phone.

Q: Beyoncé lip synced? Good or bad for the brand?

—Simon S., Winston-Salem, NC

MG: Nothing can derail the Mrs. Jay-Z train. She’s unstoppable and there is no reason this should have been a continuing story because besides having the kind of generational beauty that most of us can only wish for, there is one thing she can do without question and that’s sing circles around anyone. Whitney lip synced at the Super Bowl and her rendition hit #1 on the charts soon thereafter. Beyoncé is much bigger that Whitney ever was.

Q: What are you going to do with “The Voice” now that Christina Aguilera has been replaced with Shakira?

—Jon M., Oklahoma City, OK

MG: I deleted my Season Pass on The Dish.

Q: Do you think Christina Aguilera caused Hillary Clinton to pass out?

—Josephine P., Kuala Lampur

MG: Very much a possibility.

Q: Any truth that our favorite diva Miss Aguilera stepped aside to spend time with the Media Guy?

—Stephanie C., Manchester, England

MG: Uh, no comment.

Q: There were two typos when you initially posted your last column. Who’s proofing your columns.

—Nadia W., Tucson, AZ

MG: Sorry, Monica is on vacation.

Q: You nailed it in your Valentine’s Day column, it’s ruining the office. Any more tips to help out here?

—Marc W., Wichita, KS

MG: I reached back to Ernest Quansah who told me that the brain’s feel-good “love” chemical – oxytocine – usually increases when women are presented with novel activities, beyond those established and preferred routines. He says to abandon old traditions and do something to sweep her off her feet with these five steps:

1. Before the big day, drive her wild with anticipation by telling her that you have the most amazing surprise for her. This promise will keep her guessing and make her think about your evening.
2. Know her favorite flowers. If you don’t, don’t panic. You can find out by making a comment, like “I’ve noticed plants blooming early this year …” and steer the conversation from there. In a beautiful vase, arrange an exotic bouquet and hide it somewhere in your home on the special day. She’ll like that you created the presentation.
3. Go to your local chocolate shop and select her favorite kinds of chocolate. Have it boxed and nicely wrapped to prevent her from knowing what it is when you present the chocolates to her.
4. Create a dish and name it after her. For example, if her name is Anne, you might call the dish “Tournedos Princess Anne.” This step is the most important. I can assure you that after having spent time in some top-notch restaurants, food that is named after a person is a special honor. We all know how women love it when their men do the cooking. What I do is cut and precook the vegetables, and I even make the sauce beforehand to make sure I get it as perfect as I can. Leave everything in the fridge. Then, on Valentine’s Day, I set the table before I start the cooking part. On both plates, place a fresh RED ROSE. The single rose is just part of making her think that that is all the flowers she will be getting (but we know differently). When she gets home, make sure to get her to promise you that she’ll stay out of the kitchen. Tell her not to spoil the surprise!
5. When everything is ready, plate the food, cover it and take it to the dining table, and then ask her to come and sit. Before you uncover the lid, have her close her eyes. Retrieve the hidden bouquet, place the flowers on the table, and ask her to open her eyes. Pay attention to how she responds. Tell her what you’ve named the dish. But that’s not all – after the meal, take her by the hand, walk her to the living room and sit her down. Bring out the boxed chocolate, go on one knee and tell her, “This is for you,” or, “You make me feel whole,” or, “You are the most beautiful woman in the world and I love you.”

Remember, you don’t have to know why this works...only that it does work.

Q: The Bachelor – how do you see Sean navigating the insane women he has on his hands?

—Kimberly G., Dallas

MG: There are some crazies this season. Poor Sean. I promise a separate column next week with a recap and my vision to how it all plays out.

Q: I think we all know your love of Angelina Jolie – of course in a non-stalker, yet borderline stalkerish way – but seriously, do you need help distracting Brad Pitt while you try to talk her up at the Oscars? My bestie is a dead ringer for Jennifer Aniston and has a similar crush on Mr. Moneyball. Any affinity to forming a partnership to get what you both want? You can email me at any time.

—Brooke Y., West Hollywood, CA

MG: Yes Virginia…these are the reader friends of the Media Guy Struggles.

Travel Companions

Ok.

The Media Guy has always hated two things about press junkets:

1. Assembling press kits (yes, we still use paper kits because the media reads on paper and takes copy points from the flash drive) and,
2. Packing a suitcase (I roll with a 22” Hartmann beauty and it can still be a struggle.)

I mean, don’t we all want to look like George Clooney and his perfect travel companion (ok, second favorite because Vera Farmiga would be MY favorite) wheeling around the airport in perfect harmony.

But, what about getting to the hotel and realizing you forgot your favorite pair of shoes at the house or even getting to the baggage claim and finding out the airline lost your bag?

It can be a schlep traveling from point A to point B, but there are tricks to packing the perfect amount. So who better to turn to that Emmy Award-winning stylist David Zyla? The author of The Color of Style, has dressed names including Tom Hanks, Hillary Clinton, Neil Patrick Harris, Carol Burnett, and many more.

MEDIA GUY: How many suitcases do we need?

DAVID ZYLA: Three

Zyla packs with style.

MG: What type of suit case will we need?

DZ: Depending on the amount of travel you do and the length of your trips, it seems that most people are set for any length trip by owning a large suitcase that can be checked, a carry-on with rollers and a durable garment bag. This way, depending on your trip, you have options of different combinations of the three.

MG: What do I pack?

DZ: On a shorter trip, base your packing on a single neutral color (Base) such as navy, charcoal, aubergine or brown and a color that pops your eyes (Energy Color), such as marigold, rust or violet. I suggest using the neutral for items like pants, a jacket and a coat. Then use the "color" for items such as a sweater, shirt or scarf. For a longer trip, add a second complimentary color to this mix in shirts, sweaters and accessories, but keep all of the basic items in a single neutral. This helps to avoid over packing.

MG: How do I pack?

DZ: Pack your suitcase in flat layers, filling each one before building it higher. If packing a soft side suitcase, utilize the crevices between the metal supports by filling them with smaller items such as underwear and socks.

MG: Are you going to laugh at my red suitcase?

DZ: If red is a color that you love wearing, then you should use it in your accessories, including your suitcase. A suitcase is utilitarian, so why not infuse some fun into it with a color that you love?

MG: Does having unique identifier really make a difference?

DZ: If your suitcase is black, which a majority are, absolutely tag it in a unique way. A colored luggage tag is great for this. I was just at the airport when an announcement was made, asking that the person on the LA flight who "took the black bag... please check the luggage tag." Everyone in the baggage claim area burst into laughter as we saw black bag after black bag tripping down the conveyor belt.

Everyone needs a "Clooney" or "Farmiga" to go with their perfectly packed suitcase!

MGS Chat: Ray Lewis

Ray Lewis, the 37-year-old Baltimore Ravens linebacker plans to retire after the season, but before his own clash of the titans with New England in the AFC championship game he had a few minutes for the Media Guy…

MEDIA GUY: What do you most remembered for at the end of his career?

RAY LEWIS: I think the greatest thing you can ever be remembered for is the impact and things that you had on other people. At the end of the day, with all of the men that I’ve been around, to one day look back here and listen to men say, ‘He was one of people who helped changed my life,’ is probably one of the greatest legacies to be remembered for.”

(AP Photo/Patrick Semansky) AP2013

MG: How special has this Ravens team been this year?

RL: With everything that we went through, the up and down roller coaster all year, the injuries and things we went through … We dealt with so much the entire year. For us to fight, fight, fight, fight and now be back here with the same opportunity … We were here last year in the same position. We were a catch away, a field goal away from going to the Super Bowl. For us to be back here shows how dedicated we were to get back to this point. I just tip my hat and give credit to my team. No matter what we went through this year, we fought to get back here.”

MG: NFL offenses are pushing the envelope more now, what is the challenge to be a dominating defense in this era of the NFL:?

RL: We have to be very honest about it. It favors [the offense]. It favors the offense with the rules and all of the different things that are put in now. Defensively, you can’t touch them here, you can’t hit them high, you can’t hit them low. It kind of favors them to pick up the pace and try to … I call it steal yardage throughout the game. That’s what kind of makes it hard. Even if you are on defense and make the perfect hit, you get flagged 15 yards here, because the pace is so fast, we have to kind of slow the pace down and line up. If you watched the [Houston vs. New England game], [the Patriots] were able to get people out of alignment, people were standing around on the goal line, which is supposed to be the hardest place to score. But it was the easiest place for [the Patriots] because [the Texans] weren’t getting lined up and things. I think it’s kind of give and take.

MG: What the difference in defense from the beginning of your career to the end?

RL: Absolutely. Earlier in my career, honestly, you just didn’t have so many rules. There are so many rules that are put in now, and of course, I’m a biased [defensive player]. There are so many rules that are put in now for the offense. So, it helps them. It favors them a lot. Why wouldn’t they do it? You throw the ball downfield and there is favorable pass interference, you hurry up and get 12 men on the field. There are so many things that favor [the offense] and it’s changed so much from earlier in my career to now.”

MG: What’s the differences between playing Peyton Manning and Tom Brady?

RL: You’re talking about arguably the top two or three greatest quarterbacks of all time. So when you go from Peyton Manning to Tom Brady, you’re going from 1A to 1A. It’s not like you get a drop-off. I’d back up to the same fact we had last week. Is he going to make plays? Absolutely. But you have to play the whole game. You have to be patient enough to let them make plays and move on to the next play. You can’t harp on one play good or bad. You have to keep on moving. These are guys, and I always said, they play chess matches. That’s the thing that you have to be prepared to play when you get ready to play these guys, because they understand the game so well. Playing against Brady and just watching him sometimes, you’re always in awe on watching on how good he really is.

MG: What will you miss the most when you end your career?

RL: I think the brotherhood. There is nothing greater than the brotherhood. It’s what I kind of preach in my locker room. I understand we’re in an age where social media is kind of taking over, but I kind of try to get my guys to really understand how close your locker room has to be. And when you come into the locker room, understand who your brothers are. Understand who the men are that you are fighting with. Because, that’s the thing you’ll remember the most. The wars and battles, they are going to always take care of themselves, and that’s competition and most of us have been in that our entire lives. But what we will always remember the most are those locker rooms. What they felt like and the commitment and sacrifices you guys made – that’s the thing that when you are done with the game, you will definitely miss what those locker rooms felt like.

MG: What is the most extraordinary moment of your football career?

RL: You always have to ask yourself, ‘How can you top the moment of hearing those famous words?’ And that is, ‘Ravens have won the Super Bowl.’ When you play the game, that is what you play the game for. You play and hope that one day you hear those words. That is what I am trying to get this team to go back and hear one more time. So they can really feel what it feels like. Because once you hear it, like I tell all of them, your life will never be the same again. That is what I am trying to get these young guys to understand – don’t let the moments go by so fast. Cherish the moment. And that for me, when you sum up my career, that can never be taken away from you. Once you are a champion, you are always a champion, and that is probably one of the greatest things I will remember of all time.

Valentine's Day Can Ruin You...

Geez! Valentine’s day is less than a month away and you know what that means, right?

Yep, the office is going to be a mess. Cupid’s arrow hits the mark and people go la-la. Cupid misses and depression sets in. For some in the Media Guy’s office, it could take months before the wounds heal. Passing by a Hallmark store could be challenging and a simple rose bush sighting could cause nausea.

Take the plight of Camille from Graphics…

"It starts three days before; this jittery, anxious sensation. Then on the twelve, the calendar calls to me like that little girl in the “Mama”movie. There’s no hiding it, V-Day only hours away. Will this be the third year in row that Bob from Accounting misses my obvious flirtations and doesn't send flower, or a card or even think to ask me to a movie? Why do I need to be validated? Why does this silly day set the course of love for the next eleven point five months? Watching all the FTD deliveries endless arrive is like how I felt after my fourth tequila at the Christmas party. I feel the fool”

...Or how about Jim from the Production Department?...

"Finding love in the office is nothing short of needing a morphine-drip to end the pain of searching. You just hit rock bottom. Isn't there a 12-step program for this insanity?

You can’t imagine how desperate I am to avoid this love nonsense here. I mean, really…we have campaigns to launch, commercials to make and yoga classes to get to at 7:00 P.M. on Tuesdays and Thursdays. What to do?

Well, the Media Guy wasn’t born yesterday. I got in touch with relationship expert Ernest Quansah. Fear, stubbornness, ignorance, procrastination, resignation – for singles or couples longing for love, these are among the deadly sins, he points out. “These are the psychological traits which singles and many couples use as excuses,” says Quansah, who is also the author of Do’s and Don’ts of Relationships.

“I hear it all the time; singles or married couples say they’re not rich enough, or they need to lose weight, or they just don’t think they’ll find what they want. But I say nothing is perfect, and if you think that you’ll only be good enough when you’ve lost five pounds, or have a nice car or a bigger house, then you will never be ‘good enough.’”

Quansah found that all respondents in his recent survey reported that they still believe in lasting love, and if there was a way to learn to find true love, they would try it. Singles are looking for relationship success as much as committed or married couples, he says.

While self-improvement is important, singles and couples should not use excuses to put off what could be a meaningful, lasting relationship says Quansah, who takes a holistic approach to relationships. 

Just as people need a plan in order to give themselves a chance with other New Year’s resolutions, such as weight loss or a career move, so too is the case with finding  permanent love. Quansah says singles and couples need to answer six questions while pursuing love and true happiness:

• What is my goal? For each question, jot down what you are really looking for. Are you looking for a lifelong partner, just a date on Valentine’s Day, or for your marriage to work? Many “serial daters” and “twice married men and women” claim they want the real thing; however, often their behavior indicates the opposite. Singles and couples must be honest with what is in their hearts, Quansah declares.
• What am I doing to achieve my goal? Striking a balance is important. Doing too much, like spending a lot of money on a new look or being too negative, can be relationship killers because they are not permanent solutions and this makes achieving your goal difficult. If you’re act like yourself, you’ll be more comfortable and self-confident – and those are attractive qualities! Remember who you are and what you love, but don’t be inflexible; love and relationship success are often about compromise. Taking note of what you have and haven’t done, and evaluating the effectiveness of those strategies, are the key to dating, relationship, and marriage success.
• What might prevent me from achieving my goal? Fault finding in potential love interest or in a marriage, for example, can hinder the flow of success. Another obstacle may be placing artificial contingencies on your love connection, like comparing yourself to others, or unintentionally putting too much strain on your marriage. An objective, calm, and rational approach can help you map a course for meeting the man or woman of your dreams and achieving love relationship success.
• What methods have not worked for me? Mistakes are to be expected – nobody’s perfect. But they should only be acceptable as long as you’ve learned something from them. Look back and do a review. If you have approached dating or relationship success in ways that keep failing, it is time to change!
• What methods have worked for me? Everybody has qualities that make them good at some things and not so great in other areas. Focus on your strengths; if you have used methods that brought you success in dating or in your marriage, you should use those methods because they will yield result. But do not be afraid to test the waters with new ideas.
• What will it feel like when I succeed? If you cannot envision the taste of success, you may be less motivated to go the extra mile for true love. Think about how nice it would feel to have meaningful companionship, bring someone home to meet the family, and maybe even start a family of your own. 

So hopefully Jim, Camille and the rest of the Media Guy’s staff has made Quansah their new best friend and we can get that new DirectTV ad out the door in time for the Super Bowl.

They Didn't Make the Cut...

“He who never made a mistake never made a discovery. ” 

I love this quote quite frankly; it says it all. I hope this past weekend, I didn't make a mistake with my forthcoming book.

In the weeks after two wildly lucky winners in Missouri and Arizona divvied up the $600 million Powerball jackpot, I found myself enviously pondering, as I tore up two my December Starbucks allowance, what I would do if I woke up one day with an extra $300 million in the piggy bank. While I was doing that I received this email:

From: maggie, the book editor assistant [mailto:xxxx@xxxxxxxxxxxxx.com]
Sent: Wednesday, January 9, 2013 1:17 PM
To: 'Michael Lloyd'
Subject: RE: Lloyd Book Changes #41

Michael,
Happy New Year! Just hung up with Amazon and we are awaiting Landscapes to go to press. I know we’ve asked for an interminable amount of changes, but we need to shorten the six weeks we gave you to bring it all to final AND we need the new layout by Jan. 25th. Get back to me when you can and, uhm, no pressure,
Maggie

Well, happy new years to you too, Maggie! When you get an email like that, what’s a Media Guy to do? I mean, I was still planning what to do with my first hundred mil... I’m fairly certain that ]I would not have poured it Lakers season tickets or JCPenney stock — my first order of business might have been finding a Westwood apartment with a few bedrooms, and maybe donating ten million or so to charity. But now I just had to get to work. I sequestered myself away from humanity and whacked my 250-page Landscapes of Life tome down to under a hundred pages. Really taking a book like this from 160 photos down to 90 was akin to choosing which of your children you love the most.

The new book cover designed by Anna Aladadyan.

I guess it could have been worse. Take a look at who didn’t make the cut elsewhere:

• 12 proposed U.S. states that didn't make the cut 
• Forbes 400 Drop-offs: Those Who Didn't Make The Cut
• Sorry Jill, you didn't make the cut 

Anyway, I bring this up to honor five of my favorite photos that didn't make the cut for the book. Without further ado…

5. RAZI. When you see images from the Middle East and similar places in Afghanistan and India, women are often depicted as rights deficient thirsty from the parched climate of domineering men whom seek to enslave their every whim: No shoes. Six to 10 children in tow, once always attached to the hip. Each woman with the same "help me" look sewn into her face. Razi, shown here, explores the beauty that multiplies from within. The picture seems to show her emerging from a cocoon ready to embrace the world and have it embrace her back. Her expression emotes innocent confidence and traces of power that we hope will be realized along with her dreams.

4, ABANDONED. Living in the bigger cities typically doesn't give you the access to large areas that lack the residue of human activity. While traveling in Salalah, such a place exists near what would be the equivalent of prime beach real estate in Malibu. These hand-built row of ancient tract homes still stood tall, yet uninhabited as if they were resistant to the atomic bomb that surely must have detonated here. The area begged for answers. Who lived here? How did they live? What would make an entire town move en force?

3. THE LONG MARCH. On my way to Wadi Rum, the desert run where Lawrence of Arabia led the Arab Revolt, I spotted these two Bedouin trekking forward. I love the way they are walking while a truckload of people move past them; two generations of transportation dueling in opposite directions. The questions loom: How long was their trek? Where were they going? How hot were they in their black abayas on a hot desert afternoon?

2. NORIAS OF HAMA. The water wheels of Syria, aka Norias, have been delivering water to Hama for centuries. They also deliver a soul crushing sound that haunts the ears in a way that no other architecture ever has. Take a listen here.

1. THE MAN OF PALMS. By far my favorite picture that, alas, didn't make the cut. The Yemani man in his traditional dress sat in this single spot for hours. He was there when I left to visit an abandoned fort. He was there when I came back for lunch. He was there when I ventured out the next morning. Same position. Same happy-go-lucky look on his leather face. He never seemed to move and was more part of the botanical surroundings than the palms he sat among.

With that bittersweet countdown behind me, I now hand of my book to the acclaimed Los Angeles designer An Na who will turn the images and descriptions that did make the cut into a work of art.

Set Yourself On Fire

As the immortal celluloid mentor Dicky Fox says to Jerry Maguire, “I love the mornings! I clap my hands every morning and say, 'This is gonna be a great day!”, I too, love the morning and the potential it brings. 

The Media Guy had a mentor too once upon a time. He used to tell me: “Success is not the result of spontaneous combustion. You must first set yourself on fire.” When motivation is low, I pull that line out a get the motor running.

When you are trying to get your creative project off the ground, it’s easy to dip into a valley and wallow your days away. It’s difficult to get someone to believe in your projects like you do enough to green light them. With each passing year Andy Warhol’s quote – that everyone will have their 15 minutes of fame – rings truer.

Recently I bumped into Kerstin Karlhuber and Daniel Jay Paul. She’s an award-winning filmmaker and director. Kerstin’s work in the arts has been seen around the world, from off-Broadway to Cannes, the Los Angeles’ Arclight Theater and Good Morning America. She is the founder and director of the film production company Silent Giant Productions based in New York City. He’s a songwriter who recently released “Clean Getaway” on the Sunlight Communication Arts label. His songs have been described by “music you hear with your heart ….” For good measure, he is the author of the novel The Last Sunset. 

Kerstin said that the caveat of the Warhol Theory is that some people get more than 15 minutes, in large part because they actually work at their success. In fact, she calls this the “golden era of self-starters,” because this is an unprecedented time in which creative doers have access to achieving an audience.

“While there are some people who see the rise and fall of their name shortly after a quirky incident on a reality TV show, the more important success stories come from devoted artists who’ve worked their entire adult lives on a dream – and then something clicks,” says Karlhuber, who recently completed her latest project, Tides of the Heart, an avant garde feature-length music video with no dialogue.

With some talent, a vision and that irrepressible itch to do something, amateurs such as Fifty Shades of Grey author E.L. James, or the co-creators of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, initially shot by three non-professionals before the FX channel contracted the show, are changing what and how audiences are receiving entertainment, says Daniel Jay Paul. “Clean Getaway”, not only makes up much of the score for the film, but also structures the plot. “We’re living in a golden era of self-starters when it comes to the arts,” he says.

So how can this work out for you and your project? Karlhuber and Paul discuss three ways those just starting out can kick-start their projects:

• New methods of financing: Sites like IndieGoGo.com are making it easier for self-starters to raise money for a variety of independent projects. It’s a 501c3 non-profit that utilizes a “crowdfunding” platform in which those who seek to raise money can create campaigns to detail their story and get the word out.

• Alternative distribution: A decade ago, it wasn’t easy to get your self-made film out to audiences. If a committee liked your work, then you might get picked up by an indie movie festival, shown at the odd art house theater, Karlhuber says. Now, there are some households that go without cable or satellite, whose inhabitants rely completely on sites like Netflix and Amazon Instant Video, where the Karlhuber-Paul project can be found, for their entertainment. An independent filmmaker can reasonably expect their video to be watched tens of thousands of times, if not much more. Despite these handy advances, utilizing traditional methods is a good idea, says Paul, who is continuing to enter “Tides of the Heart” into film festivals after having won awards in past events. He is expecting more theater screenings in the future, and hardcopies of the film are available.

• Marketing: The old way of advertising – billboards, newspaper space – can still be effective, but no longer necessary. If you’re not utilizing a method for online marketing, including the usual suspects such as Facebook and Twitter, then you’re not doing your job as a passionate artist, Paul says. “Unless you have the means or cash for a professional to handle your PR, then you have to ask yourself a simple question: What good is your project if nobody is exposed to it?” he says.

Light your fire and watch the wave of success roll in.