Month of Travel: Meditation in Puerto Vallarta

It's been a good year for the Media Guy Struggles. As the leading lifestyle media brand for those curious about the life of a modern (M)ad Man, the website is growing faster in unexpected ways. August marked the best month of all time for readership, advertising, and elevated Q ratings. To celebrate, I took to the road looking for the best food, drink, travel, and places to stay in the world.  The result is the Month of Travel where I tell tales and wax poetic about only the very best in the world. I'll take you to Russia, Mexico, Lebanon, and Canada. At the end, I hope it inspires you to weave your own story through the fabric of travel. Today I take you to Puerto Vallarta and the magical healing powers of mindfulness that exists under the Mexican sun at the Villa Premiere Boutique Hotel & Romantic Getaway.   

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Okay, so where am I?

I don’t really know how it happened or why, but I’m on a Puerto Vallarta beach overlooking the legendary Banderas Bay attempting to emulate Gisele Bündchen, Deepak Chopra, and Angelina Jolie in our mutual quest toward mindfulness through “meditation moments” and yoga.

Ever the skeptic, I was lured to the Villa Premiere Boutique Hotel & Romantic Getaway because of their Mind & Spa amenities and the promise of “promoting a lifestyle full of health and balance.” I spent almost a week meditating in various forms in the very city that Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton turn their passion into living love entity and barely thought about the stresses that always seem to haunt me back in my home base of Los Angeles.

I thought I'd loathe the world of mindfulness. Instead, it changed the way I've thought about my own mind in the months since.

How did I get here?

A year ago, close friend of mind randomly suggested one day that we sign up for a great week in Puerto Vallarta where I could get in touch with my inner self on a makeshift meditation retreat. One of the best parts—I was told—was that the romantic getaway was only a three-hour flight from Los Angeles. “But there will be no romance for me going solo,” I protested, to which the quick reply was, “Have a romance with yourself. Treat you for once. Give yourself the gift of peace of mind. What’s the worst that could happen?” I was skeptical enough, but per most of life's best moments, I spontaneously said, "I’m all in" and we were on our way.

A short coach ride from Licenciado Gustavo Díaz Ordaz International Airport brought us to the gleaming white beachfront hotel. There, the romance began. At check-in, I was treated to a refreshing scented towel, a massage, and a champagne toast. The front office staff, who live the Mexican hospitality dream daily, walked me through the a vast selection of temporary lifestyle changes. Everything from linen and pillow choices to an upgrade to a balcony Jacuzzi room was offered. I was walked through their exclusive in-room aromatherapy where I would be surrounded by lovely scents in your suite. I opted for the sage with lemon grass on days one and two and Sandalwood for the remainder of my stay.  It was then that I learned we would not be allowed any types of stress during our all-inclusive stay. A boy could get used to this (and as you’ll see, I did). Things were about to get interesting.

The Honeymoon Jacuzzi Suite includes a free sunset daily.

As I discovered, meditation days are one of the biggest travel trends of the past decade, and, like a fine suit expertly crafted by an English tailor, you can have them your way at the Villa Premiere. You can bask in the quiet detoxifying air in the luxurious steam and sauna rooms, or take a massage at the end of the hotel’s cobblestone pier that stretches into the bay. Here, you can be treated to the beginnings of mental and spiritual balance with an exclusive body treatment in a setting you typically only see in fancy brochures. Once-in-a-lifetime pampering trace their history back to the days of the Roman Empire, but have picked up steam as ever more of us seek an escape from modern life towards immersion into holistic solitude.

The type of meditation I would be experimenting with traces its contemporary roots to the late sixties and, as I was about to find out, is certainly more on the extravagant without flashy touches or corporate wellness packages.

I checked into my room—the Honeymoon Jacuzzi Suite—and immediately got lost outside where the hot, bubbling water called me to watch the sunset from my clothing-optional outdoor hot tub overlooking the Bay. All of this forced me to be late downstairs to get the lowdown on what to expect from my time at the resort. But none of that mattered because I was promised absolutely no stress upon check-in and as it turns out, I wanted to test limits of that mantra. The goal of this retreat, as I understood it, was to remove all thoughts from our minds so that we could glimpse, if only for a moment, the feeling of enlightenment. (I'm fairly sure I was never promised enlightenment, but from my reading of “Siddhartha” at the time I was pretty sure that's what they meant.)

The next day I was down on the pristine sands, filling the beach with hopes of enlightenment, and there she was there she was: my Mexican yogi for the day. Not in one of those intimidating white robe reminding me that yoga wasn’t my thing, but rather a beautiful spirit in white leggings there to nurture my journey. After we were given mats and towels to rest our weary bodies, it began.

Desayuno in its simplest of glory.

"Focus on your breath," our instructor said, in the calmest meditation-yoga tone possible. "Just imagine your thoughts are like orangutans, swinging from branch to branch. When a thought comes, identify it, and let it go." The goal was to stop our "orangutans minds" from leaping from one arbitrary thought to the next, which can be a source of stress and sorrow. As we moved through position to position, she told us frequently to focus on our breath "going in one nostril and out the other" as we inhaled and exhaled, over and over again.

Breathing and spa treatments weren’t the only thing I did for five days. There was also some exploration and lots a delicious, healthy food. At dawn each day, I watched the light rise about the hotel poolside over desayuno delicately prepared by their amazing culinary staff (more on that later). My favorite treat was the pancakes with fresh berries and a Mexican latte. The simple things in life are not free, but all meals and beverages (yes, alcohol too) were included with my room, so I lived it up. I felt at home by the mere fact my waiter who wound up serving us for five straight days remembered my name and room number by the time my coffee cooled off enough to drink it. With each bite, I breathed with my nostrils, in through on, and out through another with reckless abandon.

And that was the first time I started to realize this whole meditation thing might actually be working. I was focusing on chewing without letting those annoying random thought invade my bliss, when I realized I was really connecting—like, chewing the life out of these pancakes. As the berries begged my taste buds to enjoy the flavors I often took for granted, I thought to myself, "What the heck? I never enjoyed fruit as much as this before." Then I realized my mind, finally uncluttered, was so focused that I was able to enjoy a meal as never before.

The delectable grilled octopus at the Cafe des Artistes.

Puerto Vallarta is known around the world as a destination with an abundance of culinary delights. As a foodie hotspot, I didn’t have much interest since the Villa Premiere had a host of excellent restaurants ready to accept my bidding, each with its own distinctive style and flavors. At the urging of my meditation partners, I was persuaded to try the iconic Cafe des Artistes and I am sure happy with myself that I agreed.

Chef Thierry Blouet is a legend in Puerto Vallarta and upon entering the Café des Artistes you easily see why. The romantic lush multi-level patio gardens surround you and the twinkling lights engulf your senses. Good thing I already had the orangutans mind training by then because you swoon because of the setting along. The exceptional haute cuisine fuses fresh Mexican ingredients with European techniques to deliver a meal you’ll be hard pressed to find a parallel. I opted for the ceviche and then the grilled octopus with roasted polenta and smoked organic beets, chicharitos mousseline in red wine sauce.

“For me, grilled marinated octopus served with chayote au gratin, spinach, mushrooms, bean sauce and crispy cuitlacoche is one of the best octopus dishes we have ever served at the restaurant. We tried various ways to prepare octopus, always keeping in mind the questions: How can we reinvent it? How can we use it differently? Until this recipe occurred to me” says Blouet.

There I was, reveling in my newfound superpowers, chewing and submerging my being into the flavors I never stopped to full embraced, when I accidentally broke my the rule of allowing random thoughts to engage me and I devised a plan for a project at work the had dominated my workflow for months. In an instant I had mapped the plan out on my iPhone notepad. Ah, the power of breathing and meditation.

Villa Premiere’s Executive Chef Elias Sapien

Just when I thought I reached food nirvana at the Café des Artistes, it was in the very spot where I indulged in the bayside massage that I was spoiled with a dining experience that I doubt my life would be complete without. In one of the most overwhelming dinners ever created, the Villa Premiere’s Executive Chef Elias Sapien created an private and elite menu* and I am still left wondering why and how I was worth of such haute cuisine. Sapien, was at the table the entire evening making the night that much more special, adding his unique layer of humor and explaining how to blend regionally-source ingredients into his recipes. The fun came to light in the “Go Fishing” fishing course where shrimp-filled fish bowls bubbling with dry ice were served and we actually caught our meal with the fishing poles they supplied. 

I wonder how many hours of meditation he needed to gain the clarity needed to dream up that brilliance….

On the third day of meditation, I finally did it. I reached the glorious moment we had all been striving for: For a moment, my mind went truly blank and it happened in one of the best private beaches in the world: Las Caletas, Mexico's Garden of Eden. Access to this enchanting coastal haven runs through Vallarta Adventures, I’ve had excellent times with Vallarta Adventures in Cabo San Lucas over the years, so entrusting my meditation relocation to them was an easy call, especially since the Villa Premiere worked with them to set up a, isolated, off-the-beaten-path day of relaxation underneath swaying palms and the gentle barks from the seal sanctuary that resides on the island. 

The bliss came as I was lounging on my sequestered hammock while trying one of the four specialty drinks they made for me there. It only lasted only a few seconds before the orangutan burst in and I thought to myself, triumphantly, "I have no thoughts in my head!" which, of course, is a thought, so I had to start all over again. But for that moment, I nibbled on that transcendental state that had only been rumored. I have to admit; it was an incredible moment of enlightenment that seemed to last for hours.

In the months since these elevating stages of mental paradise, I have replicated it regularly. I never forget it and I suspect that if you get the chance to try it—really, actually shut your brain up for a few days—you'll find that place where all happiness and transparency begins. 

And, to think it all started for me on a magical hotel in Puerto Vallarta.

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*The Chef's Table by Elias Sapien

FIRST COURSE—The Wine Harvest

Red Wine Grapes

Carrot and Vanilla

Pear and Pink Pepper

Hilum Tomato and Cinnamon

Blackberry and Pepper

Aged Cheddar

SECOND COURSE—Coral Salad with a collection of herbs dressing and traditional Caesar

Organic Lettuce

Avocado Foam

Palm Hearths

Artichoke

Goat and Parmesan Cheese

Organic Cherries

Asparagus

Wonton Crunchy Cones

Walnuts and Pistachio in Flavor Crusts

THIRD COURSE—Go Fishing

Grilled Shrimp in 13 Spices

Mango and Lime Mix

Grilled Shrimp in 13 Spices + Mango and Lime Mix

FOURTH COURSE—Fish on the Rocks: Mahi Mahi cooked in pink salt rock

Sweet Corn Purée

Charcoal Ezquite (corn)

Achiote and Lime Sauce

FIFTH COURSE—The Cow (four different cuts of beef: Short Rib – Rib Eye – New York – Tenderloin. With personal grill to cook to your desired heat.)

Black Garlic

White Truffle

Pink Pepper

SIXTH COURSE—Watch out for the Coconut

Coconut Gelato (from the palm tree)

Banana Bread

Pineapple Cream

Sweet avocado

Pasilla chile pure

SEVENTH COURSE—Traditional Bird Cage

Mezcal Cream

Smoked salt

Caramel Orange pealing

Cotija cheese

Coral Salad with a collection of herbs dressing and traditional Caesar

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Villa Premiere Boutique Hotel & Romantic Getaway

San Salvador 117, 5 de Diciembre

48350 Puerto Vallarta, Jal., Mexico

+52 322 226 7040

Website

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Photo Gallery

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Eavesdropping at the 2018 Golden Globes

Okay, so where am I?

I'm at The Beverly Hilton on the red carpet soaking in the madness on the red carpet of the 75th Golden Globes Awards. Honestly, I don't know how and why I continue to be asked to cover this event. But, I am so thankful, because the organized chaos of an awards show held at a hotel (instead of a traditional theatre venue) is something you should experience at least once. What's it like? Take a look...

Most of you already know that the red carpet was painted black in a fashion sea of protests and Oprah practically announced her presidential candidacy with her powerful speech and Time's Up was the theme of the politically charged night. But, as you know, all of the real fun happens off camera, including Tom Hanks making sure the martinis were served on point and over $20 million of jewelry and watches were worn last night.

Hanks, the four-time Golden Globe winner, impressively played waiter for his crew, delivering a tray of martinis while winding his way through the crowd.

Best thing I've seen here. Tom Hanks delivering a tray of martinis to his table. The best. #goldenglobes pic.twitter.com/GkyQy8NCMy

— Dan Fogelman (@Dan_Fogelman) January 8, 2018

As always there is a no-photo rule in the International Ballroom, but the Rock arrived and everyone wanted to smell what he was cooking. Dwayne Johnson, whose sixteen-year-old daughter Simone Garcia Johnson was this year’s Golden Globes Ambassador, had a posse of followers eager to breaks the photo rule. Looking extra handsome with his salt-and-pepper goatee and super white teeth obliged all.

The Rock with his daughter, Simone Garcia Johnson, and Thor (Chris Hemsworth)

If you saw the sea of black on the red carpet you know that most of the actresses in attendance signed on to the Time’s Up initiative. Their unity hit the forefront away from the cameras after Natalie Portman announced “the all-male nominees” for best director. Kerry Washington pumped her arms and gave a high-five to Eva Longoria who was sitting right next to her. Speaking of which...

Kerry Washington vamps at the after parties while Debra Messing and Eva Longoria look on.

Yes, it was a tough night to be a guy at the 75th Golden Globes. Women were abundantly vocal about harassment and their fight for gender parity*, however men were mostly quiet. Host Seth Meyers was a noteworthy exception, acknowledging that a white man may not have been the perfect host for the movement but filling his monologue with enough self-deprecation and righteous barbs to ease any concerns – or maybe he had some smart writers. Otherwise, mum was the word for men about the subject, with their biggest statements made in the form of fashionable lapel pins.

(*) I mean multiple Academy Award nominee Michelle Williams received less than 1% of Mark Wahlberg's paycheck for reshoots of their film All the Money in the World. Yikes!

"I want to give room to the women that don't normally have voices to talk about their sexual assault and rape and I'm listening. They need to know that it's not their fault and they're not dirty and that's my message tonight." --Viola Davis

The Feud Continues? When Jennifer Aniston appeared onstage, all eyes were on the Friends icon. Well, all except two, it seems. Seated at a table near the stage, Angelina Jolie appeared to look down and ignore Aniston as she presented an award. Super Awkward. 

Past Media Guy Golden Globes Columns: 

2017 - Eavesdropping at the 2017 Golden Globes

2016 - The Red Carpet and Beyond

2015 - Sweaty Globes

Golden Globes Gallery

Alexi Ashe with hubby Seth Meyers on the carpet.

Jessica Chastain and Octavia Spencer have a Help reunion.

Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel retained their throne a Hollywood's Royal Couple.

Backstage, us writers in the press room had access to buckets of beer on ice.

Obi-Wan, er, Ewan McGregor, won for his role in Fargo.

Elisabeth Moss won for The Handmaid's Tale while Connie Britton wore a $380 "Poverty is Sexist" sweater.

Penelope Cruz always dazzles.

Michelle Williams (right) with civil rights advocate Tarana Burke who started the #MeToo movement.

My tix to the show!

A Little Closer to Hell...

You won't be seeing this guy on the Oscars Red Carpet anytime soon...

I'm watching another Hollywood career move to life support as Harvey Weinstein's atrocious behavior is coming to light with a never-ending barrage of A-listers leveling allegations of sexual harassment ever since The New York Times published their exposé.

I mean, when Oscar winners Gwyneth Paltrow and Angelina Jolie start talking about you saying they are done keeping his secret now, because “women need to send a clear message that this is over” then rest assured, it's going to be over.

Yeah, this won't end well.

I have to say that I jumped on the anti-casting couch bandwagon over a year ago when I penned a column about "Casting Call, The Project," where real women read real casting notices. Maybe Weinstein should have read this...maybe he did and didn't care. Regardless, R.I.P. to Harvey Weinstein as a Hollywood mogul.

Speaking of dying careers, I hope Donna Karan is ready to see a dip in sales because her troublesome and downright idiotic opinions about the alleged serial sexual predator Harvey, you can expect women to stop buying DKNY fashions for the foreseeable future. The Daily Mail interviewed Karan on the CinéFashion Film Awards red carpet and said this:

"I think we have to look at ourselves. Obviously, the treatment of women all over the world is something that has always had to be identified. Certainly in the country of Haiti where I work, in Africa, in the developing world, it’s been a hard time for women.

"To see it here in our own country is very difficult, but I also think how do we display ourselves? How do we present ourselves as women? What are we asking? Are we asking for it by presenting all the sensuality and all the sexuality?"

Did she really just suggest they were asking for it? But did she stop there? Not even close! I can only imagine the reporter’s concealed delight knowing that this interview had more crackpot gold in those mountains as Karan finished her red carpet tour de force with this nugget of wisdom:

"You look at everything all over the world today and how women are dressing and what they are asking by just presenting themselves the way they do. What are they asking for? Trouble."

Yeah, this won't end well either. So, not to be flip, but speaking of death...

...Okay, so where am I?

Seems I have spent a lot of my trips recently near or in cemeteries. On this trip to Poland, I have visited the death camps in Auschwitz and Majdanek and felt the immense pain of death of the people

The final feet of railroad that leads into Auschwitz II-Birkenau.

interned there. Going to Majdanek was a day of remembrance to those we, as a people, let perish through racism, ignorance, and indifference. Majdanek was a concentration and forced labor camp that evolved into a death camp. It opened in September 1941, initially for Soviet prisoners of war, and was liberated by the Soviet Army in July 1944. During this time approximately 360,000 victims died or were murdered, 120,000 of them Jews.

The inmates of comprised people of 54 nationalities from 28 different countries. They included Soviet prisoners of war and Jews from Poland, Germany, Czechoslovakia, the Netherlands, France, Hungary, Belgium and Greece. In addition, many non-Jews from Belorussia, the Ukraine and across Poland were taken to the camp as political prisoners or slave laborers.

I see these atrocities up close and wonder how there can ever be resistance to giving support in any form to stop the genocides that are still occurring in our world. No amount of photos or thoughtful words can capture what I saw. Truly heartbroken.

The only thing that got me through this agony of all of this was the lunch I had a couple of months ago to the Hollywood Forever Cemetery to see where Johnny Ramone is buried and saw the most bizarre thing: a cemetery jogger.

Running a few steps closer to hell...

One upon a time we respected the dead and didn't need a life manual to tell us to either. It just came naturally. Dying is the only thing we spend our lives preparing to do, so at least give credit to the time and effort dedicated to do it. Instead what you see at cemeteries now is pretty unsettling. If you believe in the concept of people spinning in their graves, one can only image the anger, commotion, and outrage going on six feet under.

I was paying my respects to Rudolph Valentino, the actor who played Larry Tate on Bewitched, and Peter Lorre when I was stunned to see a twentysomething year-old huffing and puffing down the cracked cement path that separates the grave sites. She passed me and then two other women in short-shorts who were power walking almost slamming to a man walking his three dogs.

Seriously? It's a cemetery for goodness sakes!

Also seen at the cemetery...ugh!

There's headstones and monuments and ghosts trying in earnest to rest in peace! This is hallowed ground and not your playground. Whenever I see a jogger sprinting through a cemetery, I secretly wish he was screaming as a dozen ghouls and zombies chase him down with a book of etiquette. I mean, how tone deaf can you be to think that your pursuit of fitness extends to desecrating sacred resting places with your exercise? I mean just because it's quiet and green, does it give you a pass to take over? What don't you lay out a picnic blanket over that fresh mound of dirt, set up a barbecue and cook a filet? Better yet, lay out your yoga mat and find your zen spot.

C'mon people, a little respect please...leave those souls in the ground some dignity and solitude. This isn't parking on Hollywood Boulevard. We don't need no jogging signs to point this out, do we? I mean there aren't signs in church that say no iPods in the sanctuary, but you know not to bring those things there.

Leave the dead their peace.

Stop vandalizing grave sites with your running shoe footprints which bring you a little closer to hell with each step.

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Harvey Weinstein was personally thanked or praised by name in at least 34 Oscar speeches from 1993 through 2016...ugh!:

Dissed By a Screen Legend...

Feeling like a Neanderthal today. 

Okay so where am I?

Current mood says I am lost in my own mind. I'm in a bit of a funk with this Clio Awards shortlist announcement staring me in my face. Scroll down. Scroll up. Scroll sideways. Nothing but the giants of advertising there. Not a Media Guy campaign to be found. My single entry was not selected.

Ugh.

I imagine this is what Angelina Jolie felt like in early 2015 when the Academy Awards were announced and she wasn't nominated for Unbroken. I guess it would be easy to flick this away attributing the slight to the old adage that David loses to Goliath 99% of the time. I mean look at who was nominated:

      -Barbie
      -Burger King
      -Getty Images
      -Heineken
      -Kraft Heinz
      -Netflix / House of Cards
      -UNICEF
      -Wrigley, a Subsidiary of Mars, Incorporated

There are others on the shortlist too. Shoot, even the smaller names are big names in the real world. 

"Wait till next year!" was the rallying cry...mine too.

I spent two days telling myself in true loser rationalization, "Wait till next year!" In the 1940s and '50s, the Brooklyn Dodgers (no David by any means) could never win it all Most often they would lose to their cross-town rivals, the hated Giants or the hated Yankees. The rallying cry was "Wait till next year!" Then in 1955, it was next year. The Brooklyn Dodgers finally won it all. Then they broke the hearts of Brooklynites and moved their beloved team to Los Angeles. Yet, I digress...

It's been a really great month I have to say. My Media Guy Struggles pilot is getting noticed and all, but it doesn't hide the fact that my bid to win my first Clio since 1999 was snuffed out. Denied. A stomach punch of sorts. Happy hour starts early today, I suppose.

So here it is, #ThrowbackThursday, and all of this reminded me of the time when a screen legend dissed me in the wildest way possible...

...The announcement took me back to those regular Secret Life of Walter Mitty moments to that time I was at a cocktail party with King Kong and I’m telling him about how much I loved his work on top

Being dissed by King Kong was a stomach punch.

of the Empire State Building and the Twin Towers and asking how he feels about working with leading ladies Fay Wray, Jessica Lange and Naomi Watts. And I'm waiting for his answer and he's giving me this growling stare but finally he breaks the silence and says, "I like them as long as they are blonde, but what you should have asked is if I thought Peter Jackson brought his A-game or not to the last movie and if he could gotten more out of my performance." And I instantly start perspiring and going back into the dark place in my mind wondering how I could've screwed up meeting a screen legend on the scale of Kong himself and after what seems like a lifetime he bursts into laughter and says, "Relax, I’m screwing with your simple homo sapiens mind." And I start laughing as well. Louder and louder, like I never laughed before - in part out of pure relief - and both of us wind up giggling like schoolgirls for what feels like a solid ten minutes. Finally after we catch our breath he says to me, "Why don't we go raid the bar in the misses private room and you show me what you can do with that opposable thumb." And I'm like, "You're still messing with me, right?" And he's like, "I'm serious as planes shooting monkeys from the sky." So I kind of wring my hands a bit and tell him, "Kong, I'm not really comfortable with..." Then he goes stone cold, staring off into the distance, and says, "You tell anyone about this and not a single effing soul will believe you." And without making eye contact he spits his jawbreaker into my drink and walks away. And I'm all, "Holy crap! King Kong sucks on jawbreakers?"

Well...all that's left to say is, of course, "wait till next year!"

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Who did is better? You Decide...

Kong and Fay Wray:



Kong and Jessica Lange:



Kong and Naomi Watts:

Backstage at the Oscars: 2015

Reason no. 1,341 why I love writing the annual “Oscars Backstage” column: My agent.

I need a slightly smaller version of this one!

Last year, I reported on my tear-inducing plea to my agent imploring him to draw a map for me so I could be in a position to bring him that wondrous eight-pound statuette. After his two-word reply ("I will"), I was buoyed by the prospects. Multiple scripts in hand and a fully rehearsed Oscars acceptance speech in hand has gotten me nothing.

And yet …

I keep dreaming. We keep dreaming. We take the words of Best Adapted Screenplay winner Graham Moore ("The Imitation Game") when he says on stage, "Stay weird, stay different. And then when it's your turn and you're standing on this stage, please pass the same message to the next person who comes along."

Powerful stuff. I almost cried. Again, here's to dreaming.

The red carpet was something to behold once again...rainy with a frenzy of Haute Couture and modified tuxedos. I had an optimum spot next to Rolling Stone magazine, mostly because I overheard so much. Like how shocked Michael Keaton said he was to be nominated for his first Oscar and how Julianne Moore said her her two dogs are "more work than my kids." John Travolta was all hands on the red carpet and onstage (nearly groping Idina Menzel Alas, there was no Jennifer Lawrence or Angelina Jolie to stalk, er, photograph. That, however, did not derail this Media Guy. I found a new favorite: Marion Cotillard.

She has an amazing allure and even giggled when I said "take me home with you to France." Made me root for her all night, but who can argue with the performance of Julianne Moore in "Still Alice" and that incredibly infectious laugh. It pays to be Alec Baldwin's wife onscreen these days...

And, although the Neil Patrick Harris hosted show dropped 14% over last year's Ellen DeGeneres selfie-fest, it was still watched by 34.6 million between 8:30 and 11 PM (early results). That's why advertisers spend a $1.95 million for a thirty second commercial on Oscars telecast.

As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words, so here's The Media Guy's journey and perspective backstage at the 87th Academy Awards® with a handful pictures and about 1,500 words including interview excerpts and intimate insights.

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW WITH: 
Julianne Moore, "Still Alice"
Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role

Finally with Uncle Oscar. Julianne brings home the gold (Aaron Poole / ©A.M.P.A.S.)

Q.    I just want to say that you are the most patient actress in town.  Five times nominated and you finally won it.  And I want to know, do you think they played a role in the way in that you won this for a film that meant so much to you?

A.    Oh, I don't know.  You know, I mean, I believe in ‑‑ I believe in hard work, actually, you know. And I think ‑‑ and I like stories about ‑‑ mostly I like stories about people.  I like stories about real people and real relationships and real families, and that's what I respond to.  And this movie had all of those things in it.  It was about a, you know, it's about a real issue and relationships and who we love and what we value.  And so that's important to me too.  But I mean, I think just, at the end of the day, it's the work.  You know, it's being able to do work that I love that's been so rewarding.  And this is just amazing.

Q.    We're very eager to see more films that are adult drama, serious films.  And I'm wondering, films like yours, BIRDMAN, do you think that will have some sort of impact in an industry that is driven by these, you know, huge special effects, that whole type of movies?

A.    I hope it does.  I think there's an audience for movies like this.  I go to the movies because, like I said, I like to see complicated, interesting stories about people and relationships, you know.  So I think whenever there's success with films like this, then they kind of ‑‑ even people think about them more.  I don't know.  You know, you never know.  You know, at the end of the day, Hollywood is also a business, so I think it depends on how many people buy tickets.

What's it like backstage? Watch it here:

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW WITH: 
Eddie Redmayne, "The Theory of Everything"
Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role

Q.    Eddie, what are you going to be saying to Stephen Hawking following this win?  And are you going to be taking the statuette to show him as well?

A.    I think I will certainly go to Cambridge at some point to see Stephen, Jane, Jonathan, and the Hawking children.  They have been so kind to us the whole way through this process.  And it's ‑‑ I'm one of those people when I watch a film, I believe what I see on screen.  And so our responsibility to tell their story truthfully and authentically was...we felt it.  And so, their support throughout has been amazing.  Any excuse to go back to Cambridge, it's such a beautiful place.  So, yeah, I will definitely go and show it.

Redmayne is REALLY happy to be an Oscar winner. (Aaron Poole / ©A.M.P.A.S.)

Q.    First of all, very well deserved for an outstanding performance.  Can you express your feelings when you went up on stage and received the Oscar?  And how will you celebrate this amazing day?

A.    I didn't hear you say the word.  That's so weird.  How did I feel?  How did I feel?  I don't ‑‑ I mean, the fact that it was Cate Blanchett giving it, I mean I did a film called THE GOLDEN AGE ‑‑ ELIZABETH:  THE GOLDEN AGE with Cate and it's one of the first films I did, and I just think she's such an exceptional actor.  And so I was recovering from that excitement of seeing her, and then just trying to bury all this frenzy of nerves and white noise and trying to speak articulately and, of course, you then forget everything but it just felt like a euphoria really, an extraordinary euphoria.  It's something I will not forget in a hurry.

Q.    I wanted to ask you about the pressures of playing someone that is still alive because obviously there's a lot of bio pics, and there obviously is a huge weight like for Alan Turing and THE IMITATION GAME.  But with this, that person is going to watch that movie.  How did you feel about it and how did that change your approach to it?

A.    I don't know if it changed my approach, but what it did was there were various things of this job.  I ‑‑ in preparation, I met people living with ALS, they let me into their lives, they were incredibly kind to me.  It was essential to me that I was authentic to what that experience is like.  Then it's about the science, getting the science right, you know, and then of course the main thing about Stephen, Jane, Jonathan and the kids is being true to them and then also making an entertaining film.  There were basically so many things that like terrified me about this film, but of course it galvanizes you, it makes you ‑‑ when the stakes are that high, it does force you to work harder and so that's what I tried to do.  And yeah, it's been amazing.

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW WITH: 
J.K. Simmons, "Whiplash"
Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role

J.K. Simmons says call your mom and dad, but never text.

Q.    With all of your long credits in stage, screen, television, T.V. commercials, what does this Oscar win mean to you?

A.    Well, maybe more people saw me tonight than see me in the commercials for the first time, because I know those are seen by more people than the films.  This is the, you know, the cherry on top of this extraordinary experience that WHIPLASH has been for me.

Q.    I got the feeling that you wanted to talk a little more about when you said, "Call your mom.  Call your dad."  It felt like you wanted to go somewhere with that.

A.    I got out most of what I wanted to, and I was somewhat taken aback by the response from people that I don't know, honestly.  So, but no, I said most of what I wanted to say.  I never go up there scripted, really.  Most of it came out.

Q.    You know, this has been quite a triumphant time, and we always talk about, especially actors, how do you cope with the down times how, do you cope with the lean times.  I'm always fascinated with how do you cope with success?  How have these weeks added up, looking back?  Thrilled?  Scared?  What?

A.    Yeah, it's definitely more tiring than the lean times.  The lean times, you get plenty of sleep, and you are not flying around everywhere.  So there is that.  And for me, the lean times were a wonderful and beautiful part of my life, you know.  I was, you know, struggling, quote/unquote, for many years doing regional theatre for not much money all over the country and doing odd jobs in between, but I didn't have a wife and kids to support.  So I had no responsibilities other than feeding myself and trying to be a decent human being and trying to get better at what I was wanting to do.  And I look back on those times with great fondness.

BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW WITH: 
Patricia Arquette, "Boyhood"
Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role

Jared Leto congratulates Arquette. (Monica Almeida/The New York Times)

Q.    What was the biggest challenge in this project for you?

A.    The weird thing is there was no challenge, in a weird way.  I was just amazed that this filmmaker, Richard Linklater, wanted to make a movie about everyday people, people we don't usually see in movies, and that he could get financing because it is a film business after all, and you can't have a contract because Olivia de Havilland fought for us not to be in indentured servitude. So we have a seven‑year contract rule in America.  So, this little boy could have decided at seven years he wanted to walk away.  And even though it was a small budget movie, $2.8 million, he could have walked away in the middle of our movie.  To sort of find a financier to give us money, even though it was just $2.8 million.  That's a big investment to make with no safety net.  And I was actually kind of blown away that the Producers Guild didn't honor that because that really was such a brave move.

Q.    What do you think, given the comments you made tonight about someone like Amy Pascal, the former Sony Pictures head who said, effectively, that women should be better negotiators, that it's not up to her to pay women more when she has effectively underpaid women.

A.    Again, I think we need federal laws that are comprehensive; in different states, they have altogether thrown out the Fairness Voting Act.  People think we have equal rights; we won't until we pass a Constitutional amendment in the United States of America where we pass the ERA once and for all and women have equal rights in America we won't have anything changed.  This morning, you know, there's these things, the Mani Cam and so on and what are you wearing.  I'm wearing a dress my best friend designed.  We have been best friends since we were 7 and 8 years old.  I think she was the first person who ever said to me, what do you want to be when we grow up?  We were standing next to her Barbie Dream House.  I made fun of her because she played with a Barbie and my mom wouldn't let us have Barbies.  She said, what do you want to be?  And I said I want to be an actor. What do you want to be?  She said, I want to be in fashion.  And she became a great fashion designer and she designed my gown, so it's like wearing love.  And we started an organization, GiveLove.org. And instead of getting a manicure, which I was supposed to do this morning for that dreaded Mani Cam, instead, I ended up trying to pull pictures because we started a sweepstakes this morning for our charity to do ecological sanitation in the world.  Now when I saw Harry Belafonte's picture up there, I remembered my mom.  She was an Equal Rights activist, she worked for civil rights.  And this is who I am.  This is the whole who I am.  I love my business, I love acting and I love being a human being on earth and I want to help.  I never saw this moment in me winning an Academy Award.  I never even thought I would be nominated and I was okay with that.  But you know what I did see?  I saw many things that have come true in my life, and one of them was helping thousands and thousands of people, and I have, and I will, and I will help millions of people.  Thank you.


BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW WITH: 
Alejandro G. Iñárritu "Birdman or The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance"
Directing

The Big Winner of the Night.

Q.    Congratulations on your win.  You joked on stage that you were wearing the BIRDMAN tighty‑whities.  Are you actually wearing them?

A.    We should be in a more intimate context to show you, which I don't think will happen.


Q.    Alejandro, tell me, from having this wild, artistic idea and seeing it all the way through to experience three Oscars with you, what's the lesson of that for you?  What does that tell you about your ambitions?

A.    About what, sorry?

Q.    To take ‑‑ just like following this dream, how does the trophy sort of validate what you are doing?

A.    You know, actually, I think ‑‑ it's a good question because I haven't figured out why I did what I did in this film, why I took those chances.  I think it's when you lose fear.  I think fear is an incredible ‑‑ fear is the condom of life, you know.  It doesn't allow you to enjoy things, so certainly when you fucking get the condom out then you say, okay, probably get it or not, but at least that's what it's ‑‑ so I put it out.  So I did it without and this is the result.  It was real.  It was making love for sure.

Past Oscars Columns:
2014 - 2013 - 2012

NOTES ON THE SCORECARD:

Who wore it better...?

Monica...

...or Lady Gaga?

He's got chills and they are a multiplying!:

John Travolta continues his Oscars onslaught. This time, Scarlett Johansson is the victim.

John Legend and Common were epic:

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun starring Kerry Washington and Viola Davis...

Caught a gander at THE ENVELOPES!

The famous envelopes are 75 years old, though Oscar itself is 87 years old. Two extra sets of the Oscars envelopes are made, as emergency backups. Red lacquered lining is waxed to ensure the card with winner's name is fumble-proof. The stuffing of the envelopes takes place outside of the studio, in a top-secret process that protects the Academy's picks. Weighing a quarter of a pound, each costing $200 each to produce and seen by millions of viewers around the world, it's the Oscar envelope.

It bears, after all, the Oscar winner's name.

Finally, my top six favorites from the red carpet:

6) Jared Leto as he fights the rain...

5) Anna Kendrick in her raspberry heaven of a dress...

4) The fedora'ed J.K. Simmons...

3) The spunk and fun of Reese Witherspoon...

2) Capt. Red Carpet: Adam Levine...

And my #1 favorite: Marion Cotillard:

With that, I'll see you next year on the red carpet with an update from my agent!